AMY IS ON THE POST DOCTORATE DIET

We had a really bizarre visit to the doctors at Johns Hopkins today. My oncologist is at Georgetown Hosp in DC, but I consult the oncologists at Hopkins where I had my second surgery. First we saw the oncologist, who talked about various options, depending on whether the tumor is increasing, shrinking, or stable as he put it. Also, I asked about a lab that does genetic sequencing of colon tumors, in case I need to stun my cancer with something new (and untried.)

Then we saw my surgeon. He looked at the CD of my CAT scans and said, I don't see the tumor, I don't know what they're talking about. So Dave and I just laughed. WTF! I don't actually believe this new piece of happiness, because a similar thing happened way back in January when a surgeon at Georgetown looked at the scans of my colon tumor and said, it's not cancer, it's diverticulitis. (I jumped across the desk to shake his hand, and sent him a huge bouquet of chocolate covereds). Today when the surgeon said there's no tumor, we said, oh that would be nice! The doc decided he'll ask a radiologist to read the scans. hmm, but the radiologist who already read the scans at Georgetown said, it's a tumor.

okay, so Donovan? first there is a tumor then there is no tumor then there is.

i just can't take this seriously, but we did feel very happy for awhile and decided to eat Greek food, which was very good.

After we got home, I realized that my scans are on 2 CDs, each with its own data. maybe my doc thought they were identical CDs and only looked at the one with no tumor on it. or maybe he was listening to an Alanis Morissette CD.

or maybe I don't have a tumor but I have something that looks a lot like a tumor, if you're looking for one....

first there is a tumor, then there is no tumor..

I'm still on Plan A. I have to do one more round of chemo before they scan me again. and then I'll know if i have a tumor. and then I'll go to my doc at Georgetown and both docs at Hopkins and then we'll make a plan.
the gtown doc said i would probably stop chemo and have surgery.
the hopkins doc said i would probably stop chemo and have surgery.
the surgeon said i would finish chemo first, and then think about whether to have surgery.

then there is!

oi vey, do doctors know anything? other than the one or two things they're trained to know?

this is the one time i probably won't lose any sleep about what the doctors said!!!

THE POST-DOCTORATE DIET:

BREAKFAST: raisin toast with cream cheese, espresso with hot milk, toast with blackberry jam
SNACK: cafe au lait, large. danish pastry, packaged. ginger cookies. nausea.
DINNER:
Avgolemono Soup
Traditional Greek Salad with famous house dressing (are you eating your peperoncini?)
Souvlaki on a Stick: lamb stick, served with pita wedges
Combination Pekilia Platter, greek souvlaki stick, gyro, spanakopita, domades, oven roasted potatoes, and tzatziki
gigantic: 48 oz glasses of ice water

dessert: 45 miles of highway, listening to npr until we heard english accents. then, real jazz, XM

snack: fresh squeezed grapefruit juice.
beverage: pineapple juice.

late snack: bananas and cream

how to beat cancer, and maintain weight

cancer sucks, but suck it up, some of us have to win! i'm riding that pony to the horizon.
my horizon includes LA, New Mexico, NOLA, Panama, Europe, Mongolia. in good health!

here's my plan:

1. medical help: surgery, chemo, surgery, chemo. not sure what next. got one tiny tumor.
2. healthy happy life, lots of friends and family
3. level of quackitude.
people live way beyond expectation. some are cured. each person finds something to commit
to; raw foods, naturopathy, hypnosis, 100-mile bike rides, marijuana, meds, supplements,
meditation, exercise, prayer.
i've decided on exfoliation. scrub the skin, shed it! thank you P Stallone for the idea, and
thank you for clueing me about the Pathmark card, my path to peace.
4. you gotta be tough.


EAT HAPPY DIET:
breakfast: hot ginger tea, toast with marmalade and gruyere, hot cafe au lait.
snack: grapefruit
snack: nutty fruity trail mix
lunch: whatever looks good
snack: whatever looks good
snack: crystallized candied ginger, sweet and spicy, trader joe
dinner: whatever tastes good
snack: fresh orange

after the chemo-nausea phase, enjoy fish, steamed veggies, fruit, nuts.
supplement weekly with mac cheese, chocolate, happy snacks.

MY FRIENDLY ONCOLOGIST, AND LOSE WEIGHT

Tommy Von gives me the twice-over. listens to my breathing, checks my abdomen, pokes my guts and my liver. pushes the lymph nodes in my groin. ahhhh! tickles! squeezes my ankles, hard.

I'm finishing the "picnic" period of my ride. For 8 weeks, I rest, and feel the sun. Tommy Von is my oncologist; he's checking my strength before I ride the pony another three months. "How's your energy?" "How are your hands and feet?" he asks. My hands are fine, my toes still tingle from neuropathy, nerve damage, from the last rounds. "Have you fallen down?" "What? I don't know! Have I fallen down?" Where did that come from? Oh. neurological health, this chemo crack they give me attacks the nervous system, every system, while it attacks the cancer cells where they hide, if they're still here, and hiding.

"You're fine," said the pharmacist at Rite Aid. She's sure there's no cancer in me. "You're done," said P, who's highly attuned. "You look great," says everyone.

Fuck you, Death! I'm still here!

But I have to finish, mop up, prevent. "Wipe out micro mets," says one surgeon. "Step on its neck while it's down," said the other.

While I'm still on unrestricted diet, we had a fabulous Thai dinner prepared by Diane Hodges:

appetizer: mixed nuts, dried shredded squid, lite as air chips, mango gummies, wine or orangina

dinner: thai fish salad
coconut chicken green curry
cellophane noodles with shrimp, veggies and nuts, chinese chives and ginger
thai white rice

dessert: sticky rice cake with sliced peach and pretty sauce

oooh that was good!

PRE-OP

getting ready. filled out new advanced directive, called for my prep instructions. got results from my tests: the liver tumor has shrunk! in half!! let's go get it. oh god, i can actually live? cry for happy! lots of love
ames, brave rider

mom haiku

jane was disciplined
she rationed out everything,
even happiness

SPEED DATING MY DOCTORS

I am a good candidate for an operation on my liver and colon next month, and have made appointments with surgeons at two medical centers. I wear blusher and concealer, to convince the surgeons I'm healthy enough for the operation. Each doctor takes maybe 12- 16 minutes to propose a surgery, detailing his experience and offering a plan.

The first doctor was great; he does these surgeries all the time, with the same team. He laughed at my jokes (rapport!) and answered my questions (communication!).

The second doctor was great; he does these surgeries all the time, with his team. He showed me my scans, on the computer, and explained why my resection could be considered routine. He agreed with doctor #1 on the pre-op testing, and said he would add another diagnostic one.

Today I'll see doctor #3, who is supposed to team up with doctor #1, if they have a consensus and calendar compatibility.

The first doctor told me that all the rooms at his medical center are private rooms, and there's a lounge chair for visitors.

All the doctors told me to pull down my pants.